My Daughter – MY 3-YEAR-OLD MINI ME

By Ruchita Bagga
May 28, 2021

I am sure every mother feels the same and I am no different. Like all mothers I also took pride when my little bundle of joy exhibited most of my Good behavior, mannerisms and qualities. Her Praise became my praise and each time it delighted me and gave my confidence and self-esteem a big boost and I can’t deny the ego massage which felt really good.

The hard part was when she reflected my other side too. Which honestly isn’t that great. We all have these sides, right?!! So just like the praise when she was pointed out for the little naughty not so likeable mini me, I always got a little perturbed and just like most of us tried to justify that behavior with the other part of the family, common let’s be honest, isn’t that’s what we all do??!!

Well, the honest and the hard part was to accept is that if my Daughter reflects me, she is not just going to reflect my positives but my negatives too. So did I want that to happen. Oh No No Never. So, what do I do? In heart of hearts once the thought entered my mind, I must say it was difficult to deal with.

Should I change myself completely?? But How can I do that? It seemed impossible and My brain had all the reasons and justifications to not do so, I am human after all & changing yourself can be really difficult almost impossible. It required to visit some hard facts and re look at my experiences from an outer angle, which wasn’t easy at all!!

Then came the thought, whatever may have caused my “not so likable patterns or behaviour” I was the one who had to deal with its long-lasting effects. The question then arose that if my daughter is my MINI ME …she would have to deal with them too. That thought shuddered me and I resolved to figure this out and just like all mothers put myself aside and began my journey of self-introspection and exploration.

It was more like opening the storeroom of your house where all the outdated stuff is lying, which is not really needed but is still occupying space. It was time to do the Brave Act of REVISITING. 

Change in Perspective is what Changed Everything 

They say everything starts with a thought, that I had in place I needed to figured out the Why’s of all patterns and behavior to see what needed change. 

Thought was in place and now it needed action. So, I started exploring, through reading watching, filling out questionnaires, attempting various quizzes online to understand my own personality, and while doing so I stumbled upon a study which spoke about Uniqueness of every human being.

Interestingly it was also genetically influenced and had scientific approach.

That truly was an Aha!! moment for me as it clearly threw light upon what exactly was needed to change the perspective? 

It did not ask me to change myself, it just made me aware of the many sides and angles, positive and negative effects of the quality which I had.

This was the unique study of my Fingerprints which help me to know me the UNIQUE ME. I never knew that my Fingerprints could be directly connected to my brain. I understood the potential of my exclusive INNATE POWER.

That I was unique, my child is unique, My husband is unique, My In-laws are unique and so is every person on this earth. 

To perform an unbreakable & unshakable bond in our family, if we all understand each other’s Brain’s genetic combination and Behaviour patterns Life really would become different with more joy and less resentment.

So, how can we map the uniqueness of any person??

We all are born with Natural Strengths and Weaknesses. Sometimes we ignite our strengths but at the same time we also restrict ourselves or our kids due to fear, anxiety, protection and of course family pressures as well. 

And if we get stick to our weaknesses and stop realising the power of our strengths, we create boundaries in our own lives that restricts all possibilities and opportunities that lie in front of us.

I changed my perspective and I have learnt that yes, my daughter is my MINI ME however she is different as well, Our beautiful Masterpiece that both of us have created. 

I started noticing the little things in her, which were just her own and that made my eyes moist each time and my heart swell with pride  

Even though her hands are tiny

she cooks better than me, 

she paints better than me, 

she sings better than me, 

she does yoga better than me, 

she narrates stories better than me, 

she has all those skills which I have never explored in my life, and as her trusted nurturer all I want is for her to blossom in her own special way. 

My Daughter is unique Personality with her own basket of Innate Strengths and challenges. And by understanding this, I exactly know how to handle and understand my daughter from her point of view, how to make her learn new things, how to communicate with her, how to make effective use of her strengths and how to overcome her challenges as well.

Everyone is unique in his/her own way just like their Fingerprints

MY DISCOVERIES OF MINI ME

Thanks to this unique study of Fingerprints, I have discovered that my Daughter is a high audio visual, affective personality- which means she is like a sponge, more than her other friends now we know why the mini me 😉 is introvert in nature with high concentration ability, high fine motor skills-(all the cooking/yoga/painting etc etc comes from there) and a motive learner. 

I was astonished to discover that my daughter’s Middle, Ring and Little fingers reflect her learning style. And her Fingerprint report says that she is high on Audio Visual, So, Now I use a lot of audio-visual modes of learning experience for her. She enjoys listening to stories, she enjoys attending online classNamees, she enjoys dance and music. 

Not just learning style, it has helped me discover my daughter’s communication character. And I learnt that she is an affective learner. So, it means that she is highly emotional person and gets impacted by environment a lot.  Now, I am a conscious mother who constantly works on creating best environment for my child where she can learn faster, better. I have even chosen School that provides best learning environment for my child. I understand her emotions, reactions and responses far better than what it used to be. 

It was a revelation when I discovered that she has high concentration reading ability, so now I get her lot of interesting story books which she not only enjoys but also helps her improve her imagination creativity and let her utilise her verbal listening skills to its best. And now ofcourse, I am not worried about future studies ☺

Selecting Activities for her became a cake walk. We discovered that her fine motor skills are quite high which gets reflected by her Middle Fingers, Now, I know exactly how to engage her during the day which most mothers struggle now-a-days with kids sitting at home. She really has good fun within home with lot of exciting activities like painting, pealing vegetables, playing beads, origami and lot more.

Getting your child do what you want her to do is one big task in front of every mother. Thanks to discovery that my daughter is Motive Learner, Now I know how to get things done from her. We play an interesting high-five game every day where we set target of 5 activities to be completed in a day. It can be as simple activities as drinking milk, wearing slippers entire day, doing yoga or exercise, watering the plants. Once she completes all activities, we do high-five before going to sleep. And a motivation star clap for her at the end of each day. 

Now keeping her engaged during these lockdown times is not a challenge anymore as I choose activities which she loves automatically.

Let’s come to same question - Do we really want our kids to reflect our personality?? Answer lies in your Child’s Fingerprint. I think we should give free hand to each child as per his own strengths and innate personality and help them become as unique as they are from birth. 

I would like to thankLives Beyond Boundarieswho made me aware of such unique study and today I am what I am and my daughter is what she is. We both are unique in our own ways, but we enjoy things that are common between us two. 

At the end of the day, we all want to be happy and live in harmony. The study of Dermatoglyphicshas truly changed our lives as it made us explore ourselves in a completely different and Unique way. It helps at all stages of life as fingerprints never change. So go ahead and Live your lives Beyond Boundaries.